Healing, for me, isn’t about erasing pain or rewriting history. It’s about carrying it with kindness. I lost contact with my entire nuclear family. It wasn’t gradual, it wasn’t mutual, and it wasn’t over something small. Just because time has passed doesn’t mean it’s all tidied up. Grief doesn’t have an expiry date.

Many grandparents are wise, playful, and loving. But sometimes, the dynamic can go very wrong, especially when the relationship between parent and grandparent is already breaking down. In these cases, grandparents may bypass their adult children entirely and focus solely on the grandchildren. This makes grandkids the new battleground, and can create new tension and resentment with the parents.

Five years in, I can honestly say: estrangement didn’t just make me “okay.” It made me better than I could have imagined. It cracked my world open. Without the constant twisting and confusion, I can think clearly. I can breathe. I can trust myself.